During one Christmas party I attended, the wife of a friend who had passed away shared with us, whenever we all bid good bye to another year, it sadly reminds me of saying goodbye to a loved one whom you didn’t imagine you’d be saying goodbye to for the last time. At least with saying goodbye to this 2024, there’s still a new year to forward to, she added.
We all agreed. With that and for or a significant part of the evening, most of us pitched in, narrating similar last goodbyes we’ve experienced, so that for a while, it became a homage to our lost brethren. Thus, it became part of one truly unique Christmas party.
Many years ago, we lost an uncle on the 24th of December. When we visited the hospital to cheer him up, what greeted us instead was an empty room with an already made up bed. Days before, we had casually talked about trivial things and then waved and said ‘see you’, not knowing that was the last time we’d see him alive. The same goes for the many deaths in our clan. There’s just so many of these last convos that stick like wax and for one, they’re made memorable because who would think that was going to be the final time one would be hearing the voices of these whom we love?
Our eldest sibling, who celebrates his birthday on Christmas Day, died three years ago. Our final conversation had just been a few hours before the fateful time. We were visiting our sick father during one weekend and when I told my brother we were already going, he walked us to the waiting cab, which he seldom did. Then he insisted I take with me his black-rimmed face shield which he said was better than the one I used. A thought during that time crossed my mind: I better be wearing this shield the next weekend when we came to visit. It still hangs behind our bedroom door till this day.
My elder sister likewise passed away just a few minutes after our phone conversation. She had called me just to say, all of us siblings here in Davao should come to Manila much earlier than planned so we could have a longer stay. A few minutes after that, someone informed me she had collapsed and was at the hospital. I remember praying during that moment in the jeepney I was in, with eyes on me after hearing my reaction to the last call.
As I shared all these last goodbyes to lost loved ones with my party friends, I too, have begun to look at new year’s eve under new light. Inasmuch as we celebrate the certainty of the coming year or years and whatever the hope and promise it brings, let’s not forget those who are not anymore able to share these with us. In all celebrations, let’s at least keep their memories alive.
