“Not everything is about you”, American comedian Bill Maher once exposed the penchant of some people, movie stars in particular, to always steer the conversations towards themselves, their travels or even their pet peeves. I’m instantly reminded of one joke (or poke) on narcissists, which asks, how many of them does it take to fix a light bulb. Of course, the answer is always one…but he lets the world revolve around him first.
As it is, theirs is different from everyone’s natural yearning to be heard in any conversation or transaction. In their case, getting to hog all the attention is the sole aim. Dopamine seekers that they are, it is definitely more satisfying than merely being ’liked’ or ‘loved’ in the social media universe, multi-verse, alpha-verse or whatever it’s called nowadays.
With regard to social media, some insist, the platform may have indeed brought about an open-mike reality where the words or toads coming out of anyone’s mouth are now deemed acceptable and respected. (where can we insert ‘tolerated?’ The new media is likewise empowering, and leaves us with an entitlement where narcissists feel, it is time to shine.
However, there are those who also say this sense of ‘empowerment’ is not solely caused by the coming of the internet and social media. They suggest that surely, other factors such as changes in upbringing, the slide in the quality of education, among others may have laid the foundation for such behavior in people today, particularly among the latter gens. While these theories are admittedly controversial, sweeping and confusing to many, we still must accept that, even if we didn’t take them seriously, there’s still some truth in them.
As example, try listening to any politician being interviewed. Almost always, if queried on any issue or topic thrown in their direction, they’ll naturally gravitate and expertly steer them towards their agenda, however far from the topic these are. In the same manner, beauty queens will always find ways to dig deep into the box-load of prepared answers in their head once a query is posed at them during any pageant’s interview portion. When we look closely, these maneuvers are easily-observed in day-to-day ordinary conversations. In the vernacular, there’s even a term “bidahay” which roughly translates as playing the lead.
In the end, what can be had in knowing all these? Perhaps for the young, nothing earth-shaking really. For one, leave politicians, beauty queens and others while they trip. Focus on how you face and better your piece of the world and strive to be kind. Also, I always look back to a Logic pop sheet we had in college as reference, ‘How not to be Bamboozled’. In a nutshell, it advises us to be alert and aware of how others behave in our tiny portion of the sandbox. Even though that may appear to be the least one could do to survive for the moment, sorting out the rest will largely depend on how long you play there. As it is, you’ll naturally develop the moves later in your journey to interact and deal with people, woke, narcissist or not.
